My ancestors and the Deities with whom I work are pushing me right now to get out of my comfort zone, to get things off my chest that have been piling up and making me anxious. AJ and I have been on a whirlwind of a spiritual journey for the past year or so, and its intensity has been cranked up to an insane level since the summer. However, even though this has been a huge part of life for us this year (and was previously; we just weren’t aware of it then), I’ve barely mentioned it here. The only reasons for that were other people. I am not and have never been ashamed of my spirituality, but I was having such a hard time dealing with folks who had nothing better to do than harass and bully me/us that I just couldn’t bring myself to add fuel to their fires by talking about the spiritual side of what we have been going through; brief mentions in the past of the curse and daemon that were afflicting AJ (and me, slightly less directly) resulted in callous comments from people who thought we were lying or completely off our rockers, some of them abusive in nature. As a result of my fear of what people would think, huge gaps have been left in the whole story and I think that we may have missed out on some wonderful folks who would have otherwise become friends and allies by now.
We need to have people on our side who understand what we are going through and can relate or at least treat our beliefs and experiences with respect. I’ve also not felt right about ignoring this huge aspect of my life when I write about our struggles. I know that clearing the cobwebs and letting everything out helps me to heal and become stronger plus I am being told, gently but firmly, that I need to lay all the cards on the table now. To paraphrase, the message is, “You need to say goodbye to anyone who cannot accept you for who you are, in your entirety. Their negative energy is harming you, whether they send it intentionally or not. This culling will hurt at times but you will be freer, happier and stronger on the other side of these changes. You will also make room for new relationships with people who do value and respect you. This will help you personally and in the work that you are called upon to do.” Read the rest of this entry »